A Message to the Graduates: Passion, Patience, Time

I was tasked to give you an inspirational speech.  I said to myself, “I am not a doctor. I am not an engineer. I am not a chef or an architect.  How could I possibly inspire you?” And then a thought occurred. Is it not true that inspiration-- that which we seek knowingly and unknowingly every day of our lives whether we are 12, 16, 35, 50 years old or older, whether we wear a white coat and stethoscope, whether we build bridges and houses, or whatever profession we are in, inspiration is found is to be found inside of us? If the words I share with you today is not important to you then inspiration is a lost cause. Therefore I encourage you, Grade Six Graduates, Grade Ten Completers and the rest of the audience to listen for even just one thing that may be important to you in your life as I speak. Of course, to find the one thing, you have to listen to the entire speech.  I promise it won’t be one hour long. 

A thirteen-year old girl sits in the middle of a party filled with people who are at least two years older than her. She watches the crowd. They talk to one another. Music is blaring in the background. She wonders why she is even there. But then again, she thought, I could not very well attend the children’s Christmas party either. I am too old for that. And yet, it seems I am too young for this. She sits through the entire two hours until it is time to go home. 

A sixteen-year enters a college campus on the first day of school. The school is new. The program she is enrolled in is new. The teachers are new. Classmates are new. Even the air she breathes into her very much eager collegiate lungs is new. The only ones left that are old are her clothes. She wonders whether she will ever get used to the newness of it all. Then she said to herself, “No matter, I graduated from the best school in the city. I will concentrate in being at the top of my class.  I can do this. I hold the world at my fingertips. ”

The thirteen year old was me. At the time I remember it came to a point whether I did not know if I would still act like a child or as a young adult. Will I play Chinese garter with my classmates? Or was I too old for that? Will I play “bahaw-bahaw, jack stone, tago-tago, dakop-dakop” with them?  I was in between. It was like waiting for a tricycle ride to go to a place where it is too near to commute and yet too far to walk to. But the one sure thing that one must do is to go to that place. Entering junior high school is quite like this, I believe.  Even if we are unsure of our selves, of how we are going to face the new road ahead, we just have to forge on.  Because there is so much to look forward to and so much more to learn. 

What is there to look forward to? What is there to learn in Junior High school?  

I had to ask help from a few people to recall what their most memorable days were in high school. And these were their answers: Summer vacations, more freedom to do things with friends, sleepovers, field trips, plays, participating in clubs and organizations of interests: art, music, sports, dance and the making of lifelong friendships. What they failed to mention was the wonderful, amazing world of Calculus, Trigonometry, Geometry, Ang Noli Me Tangere at El Filibusterismo and the very encouraging hours of research and term papers defense! Oh there is so much to look forward to in Junior High. Am I correct Grade 10? 

Here is what you will learn: Two things-- Changes and Challenges. They happen.  It is the fact of life. There will be times when you will be caught in the whirlwind of it all wondering if this will ever end and you end up asking yourself, “Who am I? Where am I in all of this beyond term papers, projects and requirements? Will I even have time to be who I really am and who I want to become?” Don't worry. You will find your answers. No doubt about it. But you will soon learn that they will not appear out of nowhere and pop up after you ask the question. You will have to look for them. You will have to work for them. You will have to experience them.  And, you will soon learn to appreciate the experiences that challenge you. Those that make you sweat a little. Those that make you use the most important thing between your ears. Because those are the ones that will change you, make you a better person. Enter Calculus and El Filibusterismo. 

Changes, they happen every day , just like the constant updates our smart phones are doing with the gazillion apps we have in them saying, “Several updates are waiting. Click to approve.”  

But remember that while academics in Junior High may be overwhelming, there is life outside of it. Perhaps even more so.  You will find it in laughter shared with your friends, in easy, insightful, or often difficult conversations with your teachers. You will find it in thought-provoking dialogues with your parents such as: "Anak, ayaw sa panguyab, ha." "Wala pa man ko manguyab, Pa. Crush- crush pa man lang." You will find life in the sketches, sculptures and paintings you will be making, in sweet music you will be rendering as you pluck guitar strings or pound on piano keys, in plays you will be acting in and poems you will be writing, in every dribble of the ball, in every spike you strike over the net, in every 5, 10 or 20 kilometer race you will run. You will find the answers in new people you will meet who will become lifelong friends. In other words, you will find the answers; you will find yourself, out of the chaos of all the changes happening, all in good time. 

So when the time comes when life asks of you, “Several updates are waiting to be approved,” I hope you do click that button because you will become the better person because of it.  And that will be something to look forward to.

Let’s talk about the Senior High School Program. I think your parents may have slowly come to accept this fact. This change has been quite disconcerting considering the additional two years added to your high school education. I imagine in your minds, you have all but run out of comments that are similar to: “Kapoya oy. Ngano pa man. Kadugay pa ba diay nako maka human. Kadako pa ba sa gastohonon.” Pero kay dili naman gyud ni mapugngan, ato nalang ning pagadawaton. The school administration may have already explained to you the ideal behind this program. I will not go into the details of it. But here’s what I do understand and what I will tell you about it.

While we have slowly come to embrace the inevitable, how about if we think of it this way: 

When a pastry chef bakes bread, he doesn’t immediately throw the dough in the oven. An intricate process is required to produce that one delicious tasting Pan de Sal or Monay. When an artist, furniture maker creates a bed out of a huge block of Narra, he does not just go ahead and chisel all the parts right away. I am not a chef or a baker as I made it clear from the beginning. Nor am I an architect or designer. But my father-in-law was one of the best bread makers in Bohol many years ago. And he was a brilliant artisan in carpentry and wood working.   From what your Sir Andro has shared with me, he was thorough, methodical and gave exquisite value to each process of the baking. In the process of making furniture for the school and for the family, he was even more passionately deliberate.

In baking, he chose the best ingredients, kneaded the flour meticulously as if his life and the life of his family depended on it, and then waited for 45 minutes or so to let the dough rise. He waited patiently, no distractions, no smart phones, no WiFi ,  silent, he just waited. Then he punched the dough and laid them into the pans and into the oven that was already preheated, prepared. After another half hour or so, depending on the kind of bread he was baking, the bread was now ready to come out of the oven and set on the table to be sliced or put on the display window. 

As for his masterpieces in furniture-making, the wooden arm chairs and tables he made for the students in school were, remain magnificent. Suffice it to say that our bed, survived Yolanda. Even when our entire roof was blown away and all of the appliances and furniture in our house were damaged beyond repair, our bed, that Papa Ching made stood strong and proud like a defiant warrior against the ruthless winds and rains of Yolanda. Nobody could create furniture like that without putting his whole heart, and enduring patience into what he was crafting, as only Papa Chinggoy could. 

Passion. Patience. Time. 

Remember the 16 year old?  I graduated from one of the most highly academic schools in Cebu, Sacred Heart School for Girls, now known as Hijas de Jesus. I thought I knew everything I needed to know about life and how to survive it. But what I did not know was that having the highest scores in English or Math, was not enough. I did not have control over the world just by my fingertips.  I felt I was wearing blindfolds, groping in the dark, unsure of my footing. All I could hear were voices, “Do this. Do that. Pass your exams. Don’t keep shifting courses and programs. Follow the right path.” Sure, I managed my way in that tunnel. I am here now. But looking back, I know now I was so immature, half-baked, not yet ready to go out into that world. I may have been the dough that was not given enough time to rise and shoved into that 300 degree oven. I may have well been the wood that was not given enough time to cure before being chiseled into the bed posts or legs of the bed. 

So how did I manage all those four years of college? All I know now is that experience became my primary teacher. And the most difficult and trying circumstances in my life were the best ones. Most of them happened outside the four walls of the classroom. There was no fast forward button. There is an app for that now called, "Time Lapse," right? Well, there was no such thing as apps in those days. I had to go through life one day at a time. I had to experience the wonderful, amazing, tedious, discouraging, empowering and beautiful process of living through it all. One day at a time. So what I am trying to say is that it took time. Oh how it did! And it required a lot of heart, the same amount of heart or close enough to how Papa Chinggoy has lovingly poured into his masterpieces of bread or furniture.  

So maybe Senior High is a lot like this. Maybe you, Grade 10 Completers need to 45 minutes more or two years more for the dough of your hearts and minds to rise, to mature. Maybe you need the core of your spirit to cure some more. Perhaps this is the work of adding two whole years more in your education. So that when it is finally time to decide what vocation, ministry, and calling you will devote yourself into, you will be mature enough, ready to find your way in life. And so that when the winds and rains of life similar to that of Yolanda or worse may come again, you stand more steadfast, more defiant, more unwavering,  stronger, better than ever before. 

Mary Oliver, one of the most celebrated American poets in this century wrote in her poem, "Don’t Worry":  

Things take the time they take. 

Don’t
worry.


How many roads did Saint Augustine follow


before he became Saint Augustine?

I am not a doctor. I am not an engineer. I am not a chef or an architect. Nor am I a saint. But I am a human being striving to become better, a better mother, wife, mentor, teacher, daughter, sister, friend. A better person every single day. I do not seek to inspire you. I only seek to ask you this— Do you want to become better too? If your answer is yes, remember and do not forget, everything, especially the greatest masterpieces, are made with passion, patience and unfolded all in good time.